Broadband Junkie

I'm afraid I'm too busy to keep updating my LJ.

I am putting my whoredom on hold. In the meantime, I shall be lurking in your journals.

See you in a few months or whenever.

Steve Irwin is dead, stung on the chest by a stingray.

This is not very surprising. With all the stunts he pulled around dangerous animals, it was only a matter of time before one of them finally managed to kill him. Dying whilst in the line of duty, his is an honorable, appropriate death.

In the meantime, the animal kingdom is heaping accolades upon the yet-to-be-identified stingray, for finally offing that pesky Aussie git. Irwin's presumptuous manner had earned him the spite of many a beast. "Serves him right! He touched me in inappropriate places and humiliated me on TV!" spits Darryl, a spitting cobra.

Terri, Irwin's widowed wife, is hell-bent on hunting down the stingray, to the outrage of scientists.

Asks a top marine biologist, "This is an endangered species at best. What would be the scientific purpose of killing it?"

"Revenge," she answers.

A follow-up. Do you have to capitalize the word "God" if you don't believe in God? Strunk & White is silent on godless grammar.

Writers of religious texts used to wash their unworthy hands before and after transcribing the name of God (that is, the word they used to refer to God).

Now it's just another worthless three-keystroke word among other worthless three-keystroke words. You don't even get to advance to the next level in Text Twist if you find the word "god". You won't even give the word a thought, until you figure out you can use the same letters to score "dog".

Incidentally, Yahweh and Buddha would get you to the next level. Jesus and Allah fall just short.